I think I’m finally done destroying myself. For weeks I stopped looking in the mirror, I stopped stepping on the scales, I stopped caring. Eating took over to try and silence uncomfortable emotions... I can say now that I feel like the storm has finally passed, but like any storm there is now all of this destruction left behind.
This morning I stepped on the scales. I looked in the mirror. A few words to describe how I felt (disgusted, repulsed, ashamed) how could anybody like me like this. But I accept this. I’ve done this to myself and now I’m just going to have to work hard to undo all of this mess. - I know that my body size doesn’t define me as a person, it’s just a big deal to me, after all it’s the first thing everybody see’s, not my personality. I’ll always be awesome no matter what though.
Catch you all soon - 25 days ago